Feast

I rented Feast mostly because I heard that it was a jolly good gore fest, with decent acting and decent special effects, and I’ll pretty much give anything a look-see if it has the tag horror-comedy attached. The rumblings were right; it was more than decent. It was funny, it was bloody, and it was sick and twisted. It reminded much of Evil Dead II, The Return of the Living Dead, and other horror comedies. It never takes itself seriously, and once things start moving, they never really let up.

Feast’s tagline pretty much sums up the movie. “They’re hungry. You’re dinner.” There’s no explanation, and after a bit of intro for each character, weird slimy things come out of nowhere and start slicing and dicing. It’s like a drive-by horror movie, with extra rapid fire.

What was good about Feast? The acting was surprisingly good. Krista Allen shows some decent range as a single mom bar waitress, who goes from world weary, to terrorized and distraught, to tough kill or be killed in a matter of 90 minutes. Henry Rollins plays against type as a motivational life coach (yes, you read that right). Eileen Ryan fondly remembered from Eight Legged Freaks, Balthazar Getty, Clu Gulager (from aforementioned Return of the Living Dead fame), and the rest of the supporting cast do well with what they are given. Like I said before, the special effects were good, with plenty of movie-splatter fake blood everywhere and pretty respectable looking slimy monsters. Deaths of humans and monsters alike were inventive, and downright unexpected. Everyone and everything is fair game.

What was not so good? The dialog was laughable through most of it, in fact, I am pretty sure the same character repeated the same lines (maybe slight variations of, but it was darn close) multiple times in 10 minutes. The monster humping I could have done without. It was funny the first time, but excessive after three. The final battle is excellent, with the main character showing some Ripley there at the end, but after that scene, the original ending on the DVD was much better. The one in the theatrical release is too standard Hollywood, with the last “jump” scare before credits roll.

Overall, it was a good splatter fest with acceptable actors and a director with potential. It’s much better than, in my opinion, Saw or Hostel that rely on too much of a pretend “plot” and twist endings. This one is straight up, with no chaser, with no explanations. It’s not a thinking man’s horror movie at all, and that was just what the crazy monster humping the deer head called for.

Rating: 4 1/2 Purrs