HEY, INTERNET, STOP BEING SUCH CYNICAL EFFING DOUCHEBAGS BLOG-A-THON!

So one of my favorite blogs in the world to read is Final Girl, and she put the call out -

One day, and one day only: Tuesday, March 18.
You: write about something in the world of film that fills you with complete and total unbridled fucking retarded JOY.

So how can I ignore that? The problem I find is picking out just one thing to write about that fills me with stupid, toe-wiggling joy when it comes to movies. It's like someone asking me to pick just *one* favorite movie or just *one* favorite book. So to take the easy way out, I'll list a few joy inducing items here.

Movies I will watch anytime, anyplace, always, as many times as I can.

I have a few movies I will watch pretty much anytime they show up on my satellite. These movies are the ones I pull out of my DVD boxes most often. My husband groans every time one of these comes on because he's the type that will watch a movie once and be done with it. I'll watch JAWS anytime it's on TV. I'll watch it on DVD. I'll watch it edited and dubbed. When Roy Schneider sees the shark for the first time and says, "We're gonna need a bigger boat," I actually clap my hands with joy. I love the Die Hard trilogy (or quadrology now I suppose). "Now I know what a TV dinner feels like." Awesome. Anytime it's on TV. Halloween. Friday the 13th (I mean, hello - sexy vegetarian chick and creepy ass crazy Momma). Agatha Christie adaptations especially those with Peter Ustinov. (Those lead into my obsession with old people solve crimes media like Murder, She Wrote and Matlock.) The list goes on...

Italian Giallo

When I started college a friend introduced me to Dario Argento. I watched Suspiria and there was no turning back. Ever since NetFlix (another thing I love - access to movies I never would find on shelves at the Evil Empire) was founded and I joined I have watched every single Giallo I can find. I love the so very ultra-mod Seventies fashions, the badly filmed sex scenes, the mystery, the fake red blood, the overall silliness of them all.

Night of the Comet

If I had to pick just one movie. Just one to take with me on a deserted island with a TV and DVD player of course, it would be Night of the Comet. I anticipated the DVD release for this movie like Star Wars geeks foamed at the mouth for the new trilogy. Valley girls are the last people on earth after a comet wipes out the other folks in sunny CA. All that's left are these chicks and some zombies. "Daddy would have gotten us UZIs." Awesome. This is the movie I insist on people watching over and over. Plus - Zombies! Catherine Mary Stewart! UZIs! Shopping Malls!

Roger Corman Movies

Rock-n-Roll High School. Pirahna. Humanoids from the Deep. P.J. Soles. The Ramones. Riff Randall! Angry puppet fish! Lumberjack Man and his little blond daughter. Perky insurance investigators! Barbara Steele! Doug McClure! Slimy fish monsters impregnating women! The Alien-like fish birth! "Terror! Horror! Death! Film at Eleven."

My Current Favorite - Black Sheep

I read about this movie in Entertainment Weekly and saw "were-sheep." I said to myself, I must have this movie. I must see it now. And I finally did. Lamb jokes. Mint sauce, vegan animal rights activists. Special effects by the folks who did Lord of the Rings. Were-sheep.

"You hear that? Sounds like someone is sheering."

Oh man, I am smiling with joy just thinking about it. Black Sheep - It had me at "were-sheep."

I'll stop now cause I could go on. For hours. Just remember - were-sheep, angry puppet fish, feeling like a TV dinner, and those sexxxxy mod 7's fashions. Things that fill me with joy.