The Raid: Redemption

Let's just say this right up front. The Raid is hands down one of the most violent movies I think I have seen. There are machetes. There are machine guns. There is hand to hand combat. Non stop from almost the first five minutes, it's blood, explosions, and guts until the last few minutes of the film. I think the credits may have run longer than violence-free minutes in this movie. All that being said, I loved every blood-soaked second of it.

The plot of The Raid is pretty straight forward. In Jakarta, a run down apartment building is held in tight control by a ruthless drug lord. The police, other gangsters, no one enters willingly. Until an elite SWAT team enters under the cover of darkness to take out the drug lord and bring him to justice. Unfortunately, they have to make it up several floors of gangsters under his control, all very willing to kill, maim, and torture to protect their leader. You follow the exploits of our hero, whose wife is at home pregnant with their first son, as he fights his way to the top of the building, following an agenda of his own.

If this sounds familiar, you would be right. From the sound of it, DREDD borrowed heavily from this same idea. As you would expect, The Raid was more raw, less stylized. More martial arts and bright red blood squibs. DREDD used the same idea - slum apartment building held in sway by a ruthless drug lord, fighting up flights of stairs to the big boss. Really though, they are two very different movies, enjoyable in their own right.

The Raid: Redemption is a movie to watch if you love gritty, dirty, bloody fight movies. Seriously, so in to it expecting a whole lot of violence and not a whole lot of plot and you will be very happy.

Rating: 4 Purrrs for a blood-soaked jubilee of fun times

DREDD 3D

To be completely forthcoming, I really liked the Stallone Judge Dredd. I did. I'll admit it. I didn't mind the "I am the law"s or Rob Schneider, even as annoying as he was. Because I like comic book movies, even if they are horrible. What can I say?

DREDD on the other hand, was not a horrible comic book movie. DREDD was a Karl Urban kick your face off and you say thank you sort of movie. I loved it, even in 3D, which i normally attempt to avoid at all costs.  

DREDD sticks to the story you know . It's the future and society is run by all sorts of bad folks. The good people hide and struggle while the gangs and criminals run the streets. Enter the Judges - the new police force who are enforcer, judge, jury, and executioner all in one. They have the ability to enforce the law and pass down a sentence in the streets, removing the need for a lengthy trial and jury process. (Gotta love cost saving measures that take away civil liberties, yo.) Karl Urban is Judge Dredd, who is sent out for the day with a rookie Judge, Cassandra Anderson (Olivia Thirby). It's her field test, and one mistake can cost her her badge and her future as a judge. As these things go, the two Judges are called to Peachtree tower to investigate a murder, only to stumble upon something even bigger - Ma-Ma (Lena Headley) , her ruthless gang of miscreants, and the center of the trade of a new, very popular drug called Slo-Mo. When Ma-Ma decides it would be easier to just kill the two of them than deal with the possibility of arrest, she locks down the tower, trapping the Judges in with innocent people and her gang members, who will stop at nothing to keep them from leaving the building alive, no matter what it takes.

What I liked:

• Karl Urban played Dredd without campiness, and we know how easy that part can spiral in to camp. 
• Lena Headley as Ma-Ma. Of course I could watch her read a phone book and I would be happy, but she was ruthless and ugly and cold - so much of what I don't associate with her. It was a nice change. 
• The setting: Locking them in to this tower made the action and plot more tense and concise. It kept the audience from having to take in too much of the outside world. You could concentrate on the fact that this building exists rather than having to deal with a whole futuristic world. It really ratcheted up the tension and action. 

What was meh:

• Almost too many Slo-Mo scenes. It was cool seeing everything bright and glittery like they did, especially during an explosion scene. They played really nicely in 3D, but I saw one more I would have been bored. 
•  Olivia Thirby - I haven't seen her before really, so I don't have anything to really compare her to. She was a little blank at first, but warmed up in the end. She's really borderline to me. I could see other people playing the part, but not any one in particular. It's just that sort of part I guess. 

I'm glad we saw it in 3D, and I'm glad we caught it in the theater instead of waiting to watch it at home. I'm kind of a gotta see action on the big screen sort of gal, and this one was well worth it, instead of say, the Total Recall remake. This one was much, much better than that.

Rating: 4 1/2 Purrrs. Ma-Ma is not the law. I am the law.

Red Lights

I don't remember how I found Red Lights - probably on a list of horror movies coming out soon somewhere. It's a decent, if slow, thriller, and very European.

In Red Lights, Dr. Margaret Matheson (Sigourney Weaver) and her partner, Tom Buckley (Cillian Murphy) are paranormal investigators who spend their time visiting supposed paranormal phenomenon & locations to weed out frauds using what Matheson calls "Red Lights," or supernatural trickery. The story opens with them visiting a haunted home only to debunk it rather quickly after a seance and that leads to the main plot - is the psychic Simon Silver (Robert De Niro) the real deal or not? He's been in hiding for years, and now has appeared to do a few shows before retirement. Buckley is anxious to investigate and Matheson is curiously not interested. There's a little bit of a break between the two as Buckley struggles with the whys and goes off on his own, only to be faced with many curious events - birds smashing in to windows, electronics going haywire, etc. Eventually, Silver consents to testing, and soon the truth comes out. I won't tell you what it is, because it was a surprise to me. (There could be reasons for that though...as I had trouble keeping interested in the plot.)

This movie didn't really hold my attention until the end. I don't know if it was just too slow, or too disjointed, or what, but I really wasn't engrossed until it got into the last 30 minutes or so. Then I was riveted. So much so that I rewound the movie to catch something when JudoMaster started talking. Before that, it was sort of like blah blah, debunk, blah, Elizabeth Olsen, blah. Maybe I just expected a faster pace? Maybe they cut out too much in editing? I don't know. I'd like to say it was worth sitting through the first hour to get to the last 30 minutes, but I don't know that it was. It had its moments, but the revelation at the end wasn't terribly shocking. Although the special effects were good, and Hello - Sigourney Weaver, Robert De Niro, Cillian Murphy, and Elizabeth Olsen, well, it just wasn't enough.

I don't mean for you to not see it, but I don't know that I can recommend it as much as say, The Orphanage or House of Voices - two other European horror flicks that are spooky and able to keep my attention through out. It wasn't bad, but it really wasn't great either.

Rating: 3 Purrrs for all of that star power

Pinata: Survival Island

I subjected poor JudoMaster to Pinata: Survival Island, one of my very favorite really bad horror movies, this past weekend. He survived, but just barely. He may be rethinking this whole marriage thing after it, but he's still here, so maybe I am in the clear.

Pinata: Survival Island is what it sounds like. A group of college kids are on an island for a Cinco de Mayo party to drink themselves silly and do what college kids do best. Unfortunately they come across a demon possessed pinata (yes, you read that right) that has other plans. Pretty soon, the crazed pinata is hunting them down, one by one, as they try to escape its wrath and make it to May 6th alive.

Why do I love this movie so much? Well, Jaime Pressley and Nicholas Brendon first of all. Yep. Buffy fans everywhere have to deal with Xander as a sexy college guy. A little bit of a leap, but he shows some nicely toned arms so...Second - Demon Possessed Pinata. How much better can it get than that? It's pretty freakin' fantastic and you know it. It's awful, really it is. Awful special effects, really bad acting, obvious backyard LA setting. But did you see that I said Demon Possessed Pinata? It's almost as if someone read my mind and pulled out my hopes & dreams and made a movie.

If you like really bad, really silly horror flicks you might give this one a whirl. I can't warn you enough that it really, truly is bad, but hell, I love it anyway. I mean, I did have demon possessed goats in my wedding vows, so that shouldn't surprise you too much.

Rating: 5 big old purrs

The House at the End of the Street

 If you know me at all, you know that I will watch just about any horror movie there is. When I saw that Jennifer Lawrence and Elizabeth Shue were in The House at the End of the Street, well, I figured, sure. Why not? JudoMaster is out of town so let's go see a scary movie! I don't care that it's not getting great ratings. Let's see it anyway!

In The House at the End of the Street, Sarah (Elizabeth Shue) & Elissa (Jennifer Lawrence) are just moving in to a new neighborhood and it's pretty obvious that there is some estrangement between the two. The new house is right on the edge of a national forest and right next to a spooky house where no one is supposed to be living,because of course, something really bad happened there. Like some family was killed sort of bad. So when Momma Shue sees a light on in the upstairs late, late one night, she's gotta wonder, who's in the house? Katniss, I mean Elissa, is curious and stumbles upon the son of the family who lived there, who of course the whole community hates because the tragedy has lowered their property values (thank you shallow middle class folks for being so considerate and caring and two dimensional). As you would expect, Elissa just can't believe that this good looking older yet weird guy could be bad in any way, so against Momma Shue's orders, she starts sneaking around to see him. Then the real fun begins. Then you get to find out what really happened in the house all those years ago when the daughter murdered her parents and the son came home. It's not as straight forward as you might think. The ending - twisty. I'd compare it to another movie that shocked the pants off me, but then I'd spoil it for ya, and who wants that?

Let's be honest here. THatEotS is really more of a thriller than a horror movie. It's a good thriller, better than say, an awful Ashley Judd movie I paid to see in the theater called Twisted. It's not Black Swan worthy, but it does have a tense ending that you don't see coming until they start to play it out. I figured it out after one scene towards the end, but  until then I was clueless. Jennifer Lawrence is good with what she has to work with, as I would expect. (Seriously, I was so happy when I saw Hunger Games to see that they cast someone who could do more than stare at the camera with one expression.) And she sings! What a lovely voice she has. And who doesn't love seeing Elizabeth Shue? I wish we saw a bit more of her but she & Ms. Lawrence played off each other well. Max Theroit as the boy next door was a decent vulnerable, hated by the world pariah but I didn't think he had much chemistry with JL. Could be because I had a hard time forgetting My Soul to Take and his dorky character Bug.

Overall, I wasn't disappointed in seeing it, but I wasn't blown away either. I'd probably watch it again when it comes out on cable but I wouldn't buy it. Not sure it would be as good if you already know the ending.

Rating: 3.5 Purrrss. Momma Shue! Katniss sings! Surprise ending and good tense final scenes, but not as tightly put together as I'd like.

Sinister

It's October. That basically means 31 days of as many horror movies as I can squeeze in as possible. It's horror movie lovers Christmas time, and my poor JudoMaster endures it well. Case in point, today we ventured out to see Sinister. Sometimes I get lucky and find a scary movie that he thinks is more scary than silly. Sinister is one of those movies.

What made me happiest about Sinister is finally someone made a scary movie that they didn't completely ruin in the trailer or make you think you were getting one thing and end up getting another. I'll try to do the same, because frankly this sort of movie relies so much on not knowing too much, so you uncover the truth along with the protagonist. Knowing too much will destroy the tension the movie builds, and it does build that tension very, very well. So much so that I felt like a tightly wound spring by the end.

So what's it all about? Ethan Hawke (who would make me happy just reading the back of a cereal box) and his family are moving in to a new house, a house where something Really Bad happened. Something that seems to happen to children. Apparently, Hawke is a true crime writer, and he's moved in to that house where the Really Bad Thing happened to write about that Really Bad Thing. (It's obvious he is a writer - he's wearing a neutral cable knit sweater and has glasses. He drinks whiskey and smokes. He has a Mac. Of course he a writer. ) He discovers this box of Super 8 films in the attic and very quickly discovers that that Really Bad Thing is something that's Really Not Normal and has been happening for a long time to not just one family. According to Vincent D'Onofrio AKA supernatural crimes professor at the local college ( because there is always one of those in a small town, right?), Ethan Hawke's Really Bad Thing happens to be some sort of weird pagan deity that likes to eat children for breakfast.  Maybe literally. He's Mr. Creepy and he likes to move around in pictures like those Harry Potter folks. Things start to go bump in the night, kids start doing creepy stuff, and naturally the wife isn't too happy to see everything falling apart. Soon I was on the edge of my seat trying not to yelp out loud in the movie theater because even though little scares kept happening to break the tension, it just didn't let up even at the end. Which I won't tell you about. Trust me, you want to put two and two together on your own.

What I was most worried about was that Sinister would be just another Insidious. And while there were similarities, they really are two different, good at what they do, horror movies. Both had a haunted house, family in danger, creepy noises go bump in the night, and even the supernatural element. One word titles. Creepy bad guys with weird faces. Spooky children. But Sinister was slower, sometimes maybe a little too slow, and never ended up with the weird gadgets and medium, a la Poltergeist. You have this nice wrapper story with the Ethan Hawke family around those genuinely disturbing Super 8 films, all slowly building into this ending that I really didn't see coming. I know I won't forget it quickly, but I'd certainly watch it again. Just not at night, alone, in the dark. Not a chance in Hell.

Rating: 5 Purrrrrs for a movie that's going to make it hard to sleep tonight.

Wow. It's been over a year.

I find it sort of disturbing that I got so far behind on my blog here, but more disturbing than that, I see that the last review I posted was for Insidious. Today we saw Sinister. Both were creepy, creepy horror movies that  I loved. Both were similar, family haunted and in danger movies that made it hard to think about sleep.  Both were one word title horror movies.

Coincidence...or fate? You decide...

Insidious

Matt & I saw Insidious last weekend because I was too excited to wait another week. I am a fan of the guys who started the Saw franchise (if not a fan of the movies past maybe the second one...you know when they stopped being about the horror and all about the gore) and their other venture, Dead Silence, so when I saw they had this one coming out I was pretty excited.

Insidious is about a family that is settling in to a new home, unpacking, getting used to the things that go bump in the night in a new home. Unfortunately something does really go bump, it's not just weird noises or critters in the walls.

The movies goes from traditional haunted house, to weird, off-beat horror, to almost carnival tricks at the end. It's a wonderful mix of the unexpected. There were many scares and jumps to be had (ask Matt how many times I jumped) and I was engrossed for the entire movie.

I don't want to say too much and give anything away, because you really need to go into this with a blank slate as much as possible. Just know that it is an awesome blend of Poltergeist (references abound), goofy 70's horror, and even more traditional haunted house stories like Hill House.

Rating: 5 purrs...loved all of it


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Killers & Date Night

Ok, so I don't usually watch romantic comedies. I like them, they just never make it to the top of my list. This weekend though, somehow I ended up watching Killers and Date Night, both of which I would classify as rom coms. They were both pretty funny, but overall nothing to write home about.

Killers felt a lot like Mr. & Mrs. Smith crossed with Grosse Point Blank, with a little Sandra Bullock thrown in for color. Ashton Kutcher plays it with the right amount of seriousness and silliness, and well, Katherine Heigl is in her element playing the lovely wife who discovers her hubby is a contract killer. Date Night felt a lot like Adventures in Babysitting, only with married people. Of course, both movies had decent acting, and well, Steve Carrell & Tina Fey are the awkward comedy masters. They do know how to make you laugh (seriously watch the takes in the credits- hilarious!).

They were both fun, and worth a rental, but I would never watch them again. I don't think either would hold up to a second viewing.

Rating: 3 1/2 purrs for some laughs and general goofiness

- Posted using BlogPress from Bruce

Piranha (2010)

I finally got to the theater to see Aja's remake of one of my all time favorites- Piranha. (I watched the original on Bruce here on the way back to DFW Friday, so the it was fresh in my mind.) To sum it up- it was one of the funnest, goriest, boob-fests I have seen in a very long time. From the very opening scenes with a clap-worthy homage to one of my other favorites, Jaws, to the hilarious and somewhat gratuitous "wild wild girls" & the spring break partiers, to Jerry O'Connell eating up the screen as the soft-core porn producer, it seriously was just so much fun. Even the various comments from the Tweens in the row behind us could dispel the fun.

Elizabeth Shue plays the town sheriff with a teenager who shirks his babysitting responsibilities to give the wild wild girls a tour of the best spots to film. This filing includes a lovely amount of nakedness, including an underwater ballet scene that had me tears and wishing we had seen the movie in 3D after all. Dina Meyer has about 2 seconds in the film, along with Ving Rhames. I kept seeing people and saying- hey look at that, there's so and so (including Eli Roth, who seems to be cameoing in every movie rather than hurrying up and filming Thanksgiving. Dude, hurry up.) the plot is still pretty much the same as the original, you know, hungry fish attack people in an Arizona lake. Lots of chomp chomp. Lots of blood. Lots and lots of gore. Plucky heroine, wry humor from the main hero.

I have really liked Aja and what he has come up with, even Mirrors, so when I saw he was remaking Piranha, I knew it was in good hands. I was not wrong.

Rating: 5 Purrs: Really, seriously you should just go see it. It was awesome. I might even see it again in the theater.

- Posted using BlogPress from Bruce

Avatar

"I'm probably just talking to a tree right now..."

Really, that sums it up. Avatar is Ferngully with really nifty computer animation. Everyone is cardboard. The hero is heroic, the anthropologist is a tree hugger, and the big company and big army evil doers are well, evil.

Yeah, the plot, is all about your stereotypical big bad company finding an untouched, misunderstood wilderness and looking for ways to exploit it. If that means running out and massacring all of the locals by making them out to be savages, well even better. My favorite part was when the bad guy runs out into the unbreathable atmosphere without his oxygen mask to shoot the tree huggers and HOLDS HIS BREATH. Oh, and the slow motion action scenes. Let's not forget when the whole end of the movie was telegraphed, um, from the minute she talked about the legend of the Braveheart guy who brought all of the clans together.

Don't get me wrong. The CGI is amazing, if you can get past the fact that it glows like a velvet Elvis painting under a blacklight. But really, even bells and whistles do not a Oscar winner make. Thank god. Because let's face it, The Hurt Locker- that had action, character development, visuals that made your blood chill, and enough tension that I couldn't keep my hands unclenched. Oh yeah, AND it had a point to make too, Mr. Cameron, without beating me over the head with it.

Rating: Bah. It's no wonder there's a RiffTrax. It's the only way I will watch this again.
- Posted using BlogPress from Bruce

Location:On my couch in the she-cave

Splice

I have been pretty excited about Splice for awhile, from way back when I first read about it in EW ages ago. When I saw it was coming to a theater near me, I was thrilled. I ended up pleased but not overwhelmingly so. It was good, and had potential, but it wasn't the movie I had in my head.

Sarah Polley and Adrien Brody are two rock star geneticists. They create some weird creatures that create proteins for a pharmaceutical company, and they want to go on to splice with the human genome. When told no, they do what normal movie scientists would do. They go there. As these things go, of course it was a bad decision. Regret and bloodshed ho!

All in all, I loved the ultra trendy scientists, the idea, etc., but it felt slow towards the middle. I expected more action and bloodshed a la James Cameron's Aliens and instead got slow burning drama a la Ridley Scott's Alien. It's not a bad thing, I just expected something different. Sarah Polley was a wonderful cross between Lady MacBeth and Dr. Frankenstein. I loved the mixed parallels. It telegraphed too much though, so when it went full throttle to the end I knew fairly well how this would play out.

Rating: 4 Purrs for a horror movie that didn't tread a whole lot of new ground but did make it fun while it lasted.

Horrorfest 4

This year's entries into Horrorfest have been much better than past years.

• Dread: This one based on a Clive Barker story and stars a Cullen, but man it sure was icky. These college kids decide to run an experiment investigating people's biggest fears. Problem is, the ringleader just happens to be nuts, and he decides to make people face their biggest fears in hopes of learning how to cure his own. The paintings in this one were beautiful.
  
• The Final: The opening says this was based on a true story and it was filmed in McKinney and area up here in North Texas, so I can't help but like the story of a group of tormented high-schoolers who turn the tables on their bullies in most gruesome and psychological ways. One even wears an Audition costume, so of course I like it.
  
• Kill Theory: A group of long-time college friends head out to the lake to celebrate graduation, only to find themselves trapped by a psycho who says they must kill each other one by one and have one left standing at 6 AM or he will kill them all. This one was quite good. I can see why maybe it didn't make it to the theater but it is definitely worth a watch.
• The Graves: Sisters Megan and Abby Graves are taking a cross country trip before Megan starts a new job in New York. On the way, they decide to check out the road-side attraction called Skull City Mine. As these things go, they find something not so pleasant. Slicing and dicing and spooky stuff happens, and things get a bit disjointed towards the end, but I can't help but love a movie that has two goth girls who love comics and can kick ass.
  
• The Reeds: A group of Londonites take a weekend trip through the reeds of Norfolk on a hired boat. From the start, things get creepy, with the crochety old boat guy and the pesky teens that keep popping up here and there. It ends up in disaster and blood, and a mystery to be solved. It was quite good.
  
• Lake Mungo: A somewhat slow, creepy supernatural movie that deals with an Australian family's grief at losing their teenage daughter to drowning. It's shot documentary style. I was watching it by myself and I got a bit creeped out, so stick with it.
  
• Hidden: The foreign film entry into this year's horrorfest. A guy goes back home after his mother's death and faces the fears from his childhood. Someone is murdering people- is it a ghost, is it the boy from his childhood? It was spooky in places but also very slow.
  
• Zombies of Mass Destruction: Zombies! Need I say more? Yes, well then - zombies started by terrorists in a small town, gore and hilarity happens, boy comes out to mom, girl comes to term with her roots, brains get munched on.
  

Nightmare on Elm Street (remake)

The original Nightmare on Elm Street scared the hell out of me the first time I saw it. Freddy Krueger was terrifying. The idea of being attacked in your dreams, unable to wake up, unable to fall asleep because you might die. Yikes. The remake doesn't change much of that formula, which was nice, but it changed enough that it wasn't a complete retread.

Things I liked:

• I jumped several times in my seat. Sure it might have been because of the loud Boo! music, but I jumped.
  
• Kellen Lutz! The opening scenes with him are tense.
• They didn't puss out with Kreuger. I thought they were going to, but they didn't. If they had, I would have not liked this movie at all.
• Jackie Earle Haley. Wow. While he was pretty much replaying Rorschach, he does it well. Creepy.
• There were plenty of homages to the original, but not complete re-dos.
  

Things I didn't like:

• Why oh why don't they use real special effects any more? Why do movie makers these days feel so compelled to CGI the shit out of everything? I want real fake blood people. Not CGI blood. It never looks real.
  
• Why oh why does Nancy have to be emo chick? Why can't she be the sweet, scrubbed up teen like the first one?
  
• I hated her little booties she wore. Ugh. I know, I know. A shoe complaint in a horror movie. I'm a girl. Sue me.
• No Johnny Depp death scene. Not even close. Dang it.

Overall, it was a decent remake. You can't recreate the atmosphere of the original, no matter how hard you try, but these guys did a decent job of remaking Texas Chainsaw Massacre and they did a decent job this time. I would of paid full price for this one, but I am a bit of a horror junkie, as you know.

Rating: 4 Purrs

The Losers

"Did you know that cats can make one thousand different sounds and dogs can only make ten? Cats, man. Not to be trusted. " - Jenson

I loved The Losers. I loved every second of the cheesy 80's action movie-ness of it. The one-liners, the explosions, the gun fire, the hot chick...Jeffery Dean Morgan (yum), Chris Evans (yum), Zoe Saldana (yum). Really, what's not to like?

It's a movie that never takes itself too seriously. I laughed out loud. I loved the explosions. I don't know why more people didn't see it, but you should have.

Clash of the Titans (remake)

What can I say about Clash of the Titans? Hmm...What to say...What to say...

1. They took out pretty much every shred of mythology from the original. All that stuff about Kalabos, Thetis, Poseidon, Zeus ruling the gods and goddesses with an iron fist, the gifts from the goddesses, the origins of Perseus, all of that - out. You see Zeus and Hades, but that's it. All of the others there on Mt. Olympus are pretty much window dressing to Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes munching on the screen.
2. Perseus wants to be a *man* not a *god.* He whines like Luke Skywalker throughout the entire movie about how he wants to do the whole journey to Medusa as a *man* despite the many good men dying around him because he is stubborn.
3. Io - WTF? I guess Andromeda wasn't warrior-chick enough to be in this movie but for more than a second.
   
4. Man, I miss Ray Harryhausen's special effects. CGI just doesn't give the right feel to what this movie could have been.
5. Oh no, you did not just throw Bubo back into the trunk. He's a gift from Athena dude. You don't just cast off a gift from Athena.
   

I wasn't looking for a retread. I knew that Harryhausen wouldn't be there and that there would be mostly big-bada-booms, but I was very disappointed that they stripped so much of the mythology out. That's what the freaking Clash of the Titans is about, dang it. I admit, I clapped when Neeson said "Release the Kraken!" and when Bubo did show up for all of two seconds.

What this movie needed: more Bubo! More clashing and less "no we are men, not Gods! I will fight as one" and "but I was going into Tatchi for power converters" blah blah. Of course if you remove those feelings from the equation and just see it for what it is, a big CGI action fest, well, it's not so bad.

Rating: 3 1/2 Purrs because there was a Kraken, after all

Horrorfest 2009

I was pleasantly surprised with the entries in this group of Horrorfest movies. (Well, outside of the exact same, endless trailers on each DVD.) I had little hope after last year's entries.

• Autopsy: Some college kids go to New Orleans to party and end up in the strange Mercy Hospital. The hospital is creepy, and I am a sucker for weird, deserted building movies. Plus you gotta love Terminator 2 alums Jenette Goldstein and Robert Patrick. The reviews said this was supposed to be an homage to Italian horror, but it really ended up just being a gore-fest.
  
• The Broken: Lena Headly rules in whatever she is in, and so of course I think this one might be my favorite on that alone. Thsi starts off like your classic doppelganger tale and turns into something, well, different.
  
• The Butterfly Effect 3: Revelations: Okay, so I skipped this one. I just couldn't stomach another Butterfly Effect movie. Sorry.
  
• Dying Breed: This one had Leigh Wannell and the guy from Snakes on a Plane and Wolf Creek. It's set in Tasmania with a group of students searching for the elusive Tasmanian Devil. Unfortunately they find the descendants of the serial killer called The Pieman, rather than the animal they were looking for.
  
• From Within: This one was good. It's about a small town that has a rash of suicides. Is it a curse? Will their faith in God protect them?
  
• Perkins' 14: A cop is obsessed with his son's disappearance. Soon he realizes the guy in his jail just might be the guy who took him and 13 others. And they just might still be alive.
• Slaughter: A young woman is running from an abusive boyfriend and stumbles upon a new friend in a bar who is much more than she seems. She agrees to stay with her new friend, only to find out she may have traded an apartment in a new city to a place much more dangerous than the one she ran from.
• Voices: The Asian horror entry in the series, this one has a young girl whose friends and family turn on her, one after the other trying to kill her for no reason, following a history of "accidental" deaths that have plagued her family for generations. This one was based on a Korean comic book.

I liked these entries better but honestly I am ready for horror to return to being scary and not just being gory.

Audition by Ryu Murakami

I have to say right off that I am a huge fan of the movie Audition by Miike, and when I saw that I won a free early reviewers copy of the novel I literally clapped my hands.

Audition is about a widower named Aoyama, who after many years has decided to take the advice of his son and try to find a new wife. To do so he teams up with a buddy to hold auditions for a movie in hopes that one of the girls who auditions for the lead role might be his new wife. He meets Yamasaki Asami, a shy girl who captures his attention and of course he falls head over heels in love. Despite his friend's concern he pursues her, only to find out there are worse things than being alone at 40.

The movie followed the book pretty closely, only the book really gives you much more why behind it all. Let me tell you some of the imagery is downright gruesome and beautifully written. Miike certainly made it his own when he made the movie, but the book was well worth the read, even knowing how it all turns out.

Rating: 5 Purrs because once it starts rolling it just doesn't give up.

The Beyond

"Woe be unto him who opens one of the seven gateways to Hell, because through that gateway, evil will invade the world."

I love Italian horror. Dario Argento was my first foray into the genre and man, Suspiria knocked my socks off. Anytime anyone asks me my favorite horror movie, it inevitably comes up. Fulci is a master, truly, but nothing it seems will ever be Suspiria to me. Well, except maybe Argento's Opera, but I do have a thing for opera, MacBeth, and those awesome costumes.
The Beyond takes place in New Orleans, in an old hotel with a past. Bad stuff, the entrance to hell, all sorts of goodies pop up here. The question is will the young, pretty new owner of the possessed hotel survive, or will they all die and turn into ewie gooey monsters?

The movie is beautifully shot, has all the right spooky music scares, and plenty of oozie gore. I think this movie might have had more slime than You Can't Do That on Television. It even looks like they shot some of this in New Orleans.

I don't know if anyone outside of true Italian horror fanatics would care for this one, especially anyone icked out by ooze and gore. It's old-school gore though, not your new The Hostel type gore, if it matters.

Other thoughts:

• Man, a lot of people fall off of things in this movie.
  
• Eeeewwww, that was an eyeball.
• Dog puppet FTW
• Cue the jerky boyfriend who doesn't believe the heroine is imperiled.
• Oh yes, the best place to go in a deserted hospital is the laboratory. Perfect.
• Zombies! Zombie killing!
• Uh oh, looks like the gates to hell opened up in her basement. That sucks. I hate it when that happens.
  

Rating: 4 Purrrs

The House of the Devil

So a college girl needs to make some rent so she can pay for a new place. Her roommate isn't a very nice one you see, so she needs a place of her own. Unfortunately her bank account is pretty low, so she might have a bit of trouble trying to pay the rent. Good thing she found a babysitting job way out in the boonies that's going to pay her some nice change.

What else about The House of the Devil?

• This movies has a nice 80's feel without being parody or campy.
• Tom Noonan and Mary Woronov & Dee Wallace - holy crap! It's like b-move horror roll call.
  
• Oh wow - he just totally blew her head off and stuff went everywhere.
• Man, I know just how she feels. Bored, waiting for pizza. Wandering around the house poking around. Every teenage babysitter knows these minutes.
  
• Why don't they do what they say, say what they mean...One thing leads to another...
  
• God, I just can't seem to get away from pool, can I?
• And yep, that whole dancing around the house thing - did that as a babysitter too.
  
• Uh oh, that locked room bodes no good for anybody.
  
• Who is that creepy dude with the beard lurking around?
  
• Ahh! Lights out!
• Uh oh. You know it's bad news when you wake up strapped to a pentagram in only your underwear.
• Yay for blood slippage!
• This movie went from bored babysitter to blood fest in 30 seconds.
• Well, wow. That was unexpected.
  

Wow. Wow. I must own this movie.

Rating: 5 Purrs